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Following the jarring events at Tarantella’s mansion the night before, Jules arrives at the London Fog only to receive a new delivery from an address that is strangely familiar….

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TARANTELLA

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Tarantella continues with the conclusion of Chapter III: Mob Mentality…

Join Jules as he races to the house of Lady Tarantella only to face a violent, armed mob at the gates to her home, forcing Tarantella to protect herself by ANY means necessary….

TARANTELLA

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**WARNING: THIS INSTALLMENT CONTAINS THEMATIC ELEMENTS THAT MAY BE UPSETTING. ESPECIALLY FOR READERS WITH ARACHNOPHOBIA. PLEASE USE DISCRETION BEFORE READING**

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Photo Courtesy of Rubberball Photos

Getting Published Sucks.

At least some of the time…

So now, you have written the query, waited, gotten rejected, re-written it, re-submited it, waited some more, had a cup of tea, waited again, got a “nibble” and THEN….nuthin’.

This definitely sucks. Waiting? Okay. Replies? Patience, my young padawan. Nuthin’? YOU DO NOT YET KNOW THE POWER OF THE DARKSIDE!

How do you know it’s bad? Well, hearing an asthmatic James Earl Jones monologue in your head is a bad sign.  However, if you start trying to shoot lightning out of your fingers at the agent in question then you KNOW it’s bad.

Let’s get serious for a second. You have done all this work, gotten a faint glimmer of hope, and now, after all that excitement, you have a big steaming pile of nada.  Welcome to publishing! I’m Satan, nice to meet you…

The honest to god truth is that this period of waiting for your manuscript to be reviewed is truly one of the most excruciantingly exciting and simultaneously torturous waiting periods in your publishing process. Unlike waiting for a response from a query, which, especially with e-mail submissions, warrants a response very quickly, the manuscript submission can take weeks,  many times even months, to receive a response.

Why? Simple, agents are busy. Really busy. You just can’t possibly imagine how incredibly, durastically, ridiculously busy they are. Also, what you probably don’t realize is that they are just as excited about finding a new client as your are about finding an agent. What does this mean?

Well…don’t freak out. It generally means that if an agent likes your manuscript enough to offer you representation, that agent will seek you out VERY QUICKLY. Ergo, if an agent gives you a response time of 6-8 weeks for your manuscript, the likelihood of representation decreases exponentially after you move past the half-way point of the outer time bound. E.g. 4 weeks for the above.

That is not to say it won’t still happen, agents are people too and they are just as strange as you and me. It is perfectly conceivable for an agent who loves your short 40,000 word novella to take 3 months to offer you represenation. They may be busy, they may read like molasses in winter, they may just like to sit on manuscripts and read them all at once in a singular week of masochism. Who knows! The point is you still have a chance, it’s just not a good one.

Nuthin’ sucks! But keep your head up! Perseverance, perseverance, perseverance…

Leave me a comment! Just say anything, let me know you read!

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© Courtesy of Fotosearch

Getting Published Sucks.

Or I should say TRYING to get published sucks.

At least most of the time….

However, every once in a while there is a break in the perpetual never ending hole of suckiness that is trying to get published. That break comes in the form of wonderful, short-lived, wholly  misleading sparks of hope known as nibbles. Nibbles are exactly what they sound like, nibbles. Little bits of interest in your work from an agent or a publisher. You send in a query ( if you haven’t yet done that or are  just curious about what sort of unimaginable fun that part of the process is, please see episode 1: The Query Menace, you may just never want to write anything else ever again…) then you wait (a joy we also discussed in episode 1).

Waiting in and of itself is pure torture, but sometimes, in a supernova of orgasmic electronic communication, you get a reply back from an agent that is NOT a rejection. Your heart stops, your eyes widen,  your stomach jumps into your throat and you do an internal jump for estatic joy mixed with a strange urge to suddenly vomit on everything. Now this nibble will look one of two ways:

1. Please forward me “X” sample chapters (and/or synopis), the first 10, 30, 50 pages of your manuscript.

2. Please  send the manuscript.

Both are AWESOME. The second is better, exponentially so, but the first is still a huge step forward, it just isn’t the entire book. Plus, the first involves more of the best thing in the entire process! WAITING! YAY!

Now that you have a nibble, after the excitement dies out, let me give you some advice in the words of Douglas Adams:

DON’T PANIC.

This is a good thing. Do NOT:

-Decide to edit your entire manuscript in 10 minutes.

-Figure this is an excellent opportunity to rewrite the whole novel in a day.

-Spontaneously combust. (It just makes a mess…)

This is important: Aside from spotting a glaring error that needs to be corrected, do NOT do anything to what you have written. Make like Paul McCartney and let it be. If it sucks when you go to embed it, it will only suck worse if you try to change it. Why? You are excited, pumped, freaking out and nervous, a veritable TNT concoction for complete disaster. Don’t do it.

What else not to do:

1. Attach a manuscript without being asked 2. Attach ANYTHING without being asked 3. Forget to embed the sample 4. Forget to send the e-mail (no I am not joking) 5. Forget to thank the agent 6. Decide this is the perfect opporutnity to draft your life story as a thank you (the agent will not feel thanked)

And finally, most importantly…ENJOY! Your nibble is awesome! Once you get one, you are addicted for life. The rush is almost as good as a theme park ride. (almost.) Just don’t let your brain go to pot in that rush of awesome.

Question of the Day: Have you ever gotten a nibble for anything in life? What was it and how awesome was it? (being bitten by mosquitos, sharks, small children DO count!) Let me know below!

*Gush about me: I myself got a nibble today for my novel! A full manuscript request! I am Andrew, and I am SWEET AT LIFE.

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